Stepping out of Cheyenne Mountain, Daniel closed his eyes as a gentle breeze danced through his hair, carrying the subtle sweet scent of a recent rain. He sensed his friends gathering close, but he didn’t open his eyes. He needed a moment.
The last few weeks had been long and exhausting. And though clarity found, peace was not…not for him anyway. Not completely. He had been forced to learn a new way of life, simply so that he may survive it.
And he’d be the first to admit that it sucked. It was unfair. It was painful. It was scary. And it had already proven to be unbearable…though Juni had promised that he was “mais forte” now and it wouldn’t happen again. Funny. He didn’t feel stronger. He didn’t remember anything that happened between being pulled from Teal’c’s arms and taking Kayna’s hand either. He was told not to worry about it though. “It wasn’t you anyway.” But he could see the scars left behind in his friends’ eyes and he could feel the ones that had burned their way into their hearts too, so he knew it had been bad. Something that rendered a Jaffa speechless and forced him to turn away with tears in his eyes, the one and only time Daniel had asked.
They weren’t ready to talk about it, he understood that…and to be honest, after everything else that has happened, Daniel just wasn’t ready to know. He was actually still trying to understand all that he had been through. It was all just so much to take in.
And while supportive to a fault, his friends could not, no matter how hard they tried, shield him from the pain they felt for him. They tried, he could tell. But as Juni says, “The river runs where it flows.” Yeah, Daniel asked him if he knew Oma, only to get, ‘What’s an Oma?’ in reply. So as the archaeologist struggled to build up some sort of dam so he wouldn’t literally be overwhelmed with wandering emotions, Sam, Teal’c and Jack fought to contain theirs.
Nope. Wasn’t fair.
At least now he could control…on some level, what he absorbed. Thanks to Juni, Daniel wasn’t so much of an open house anymore. Though he couldn’t help but to grant those closest to him passage, he had learned a nifty new trick that involved imagining a dial and turning it down…which just happened to be what he was trying to do with his friends’ overwhelming anger right now.
~~~~~~~~~~
And Teal’c found it to be completely unacceptable. Juni had lied. He may not have given Daniel anything he did not already have, but he did do something to their friend and his arrogance had nearly killed the younger man. Although he had been teaching Daniel everyday for nearly three weeks on how to master his new…gift, if it weren’t for the Tyden Chief, his friend never would have been forced to learn it in the first place.
To their surprise, all of the Tydens had the ability to share their feelings. DanielJackson had always speculated some form of telepathy…so as the Tau’ri would say, ‘go figure.’ Juni said he believed it was what helped them to understand each other so well. He also believed this is what Daniel needed to “forgive” himself. Though Teal’c could not understand what for. The attack on the village was not the archaeologist’s fault. He did everything he could to prevent it…and then some.
Of course, Juni could not have known the catastrophic reaction it would have caused in the younger man. Not that that absolves him.
Because the only thing they really knew for sure was what was meant to be an innocent 'gift' had turned into a curse their friend’s soul would never be able to escape.
~~~~~~~~~~
And it was tearing Sam in half far more painfully than the smoldering rod tried to. It just wasn’t fair. He didn’t deserve this. No one deserved this…though it was apparently a way of life for the Tydens.
The Tydens. Sam’s thoughts couldn’t help but turn bitter. They were good people and they had been through more than she would have been able to bear…but if it weren’t for them….or at least Juni…
Sam shook her head and bit her lip, trying to hold her tears at bay. His actions, as good willed as they may have been, left Daniel open to be raped again and again by humanity’s plight.
Of course, Sam conceded. How could he have known? How could Juni have known that Daniel’s time as an “Ancient”, had already left him more sensitive to his surroundings? How could any of them have known?
How could Juni have known that when he “unlocked” the part of Daniel’s mind that would make him more susceptible to what others felt, (apparently an untapped part we all have in us) that it would actually catapult Daniel into an unstoppable and merciless pillaging of the soul… and when there was no more room left there...the body.
But of course this was all just a theory. Her theory as to why Daniel was affected so strongly. …and it wasn’t worth a thing, because it couldn’t help. It wouldn’t stop Daniel from knowing how they ached for him. And it wouldn’t spare him from the constant pull of their helpless hearts.
~~~~~~~~~~
Jack closed his eyes and fought to steady the sudden wave of anger he felt building inside him. If he couldn’t control it Daniel would pay the price and he wouldn’t allow that.
How’s that for anger management?
He wanted to be angry though. He wanted someone to be held responsible for what happened to his friend. But he couldn’t. Because that person happened to be Daniel’s best hope of surviving this and Daniel insisted that the chief had only been trying to help him in the first place.
Fine. Jack could understand that. But it was the part in the story where Juni withheld information from them- that nearly resulted in the suicide of his best friend right before his eyes- that Jack had a hard time forgiving.
Sure, whatever, Juni could claim ignorance. Claim that he didn’t know. That it was not supposed to happen as it did…but it wasn’t going to change things back to the way they were. It couldn’t erase the scars. It could never get rid of the nightmares.
Jack had come way too close to losing the charismatic-trouble magnet, also known as his best friend, again. Too damn close. They all had. And the figurative bullet was still lodged deep in Daniel’s heart.
So Jack really couldn’t help but to be angry...and worried as all hell.
~~~~~~~~~
And it was all his fault.
Because, in truth, Daniel remembered now that he wanted the “gift” and never would have been able to receive it otherwise. He wanted to know what ailed the human heart and what it desired as well so he could understand better. So he could do his job better. Of course, if he would have read the fine print, he would have seen that Ancient remnants and Tyden Tune-ups weren’t recommended collectively. Nor were refunds allowed.
He hadn’t had the heart…or nerve to tell his friends that he actually brought it all upon himself...all of it. And thankfully Juni had left this bit of information for Daniel to tell. The chief had also graciously agreed not to burden Jack with the humdinger of all humdingers that apparently all “Guardians” knew, until Daniel was ready. Besides… if his best friend ever died…did Daniel really want to live?
Emotions were high and Daniel catalogued every one of them. Although anger was still the strongest, fear and helplessness came in close behind.
They pretty much all battled the same emotions, just in different ways and on different levels. Even Janet, who had stormed through the gate the second the ‘all clear’ was given and who had stayed by his side along with the rest of SG-1 for nearly three weeks-- taking care of him and supplying him with absolutely anything he could possibly need, was right now sitting in her office fighting her own feelings of inadequacy.
It baffled Daniel how powerless such generous people could feel. …but it also touched him.
A lot has happened since the social workers carried his small unconscious body from his crumbled safe haven.
He’s suffered the loss of even more loved ones and got trapped in the gap their souls left behind.
He discovered a strength within that surprised even himself, and witnessed a little girl tap into her own as well…
~~~~~~~~~~
Dusted by moonlight, Jack, Teal’c and Sam stood to the right of their youngest teammate, waiting for him to do or say something.
Waiting for him to let them know where they were supposed to go from there.
“You alright?” Jack finally tried to ask casually, scratching behind his ear when Daniel continued to just stand there with his eyes closed. He couldn’t help it. He worried. Even when Daniel seemed at peace…he worried…
Opening his eyes, Daniel was suddenly practically beaming at him and Jack was cringing inside, watching in horror as his friend cried out and clutched to him in agony--his eyes begging him for mercy Jack could not give.
Shaking the image from his mind, Jack looked again and was relieved to see that Daniel was just now turning his head towards them.
Now breathless, however, he fought to calm his pounding heart before the younger man noticed. Because though Jack’s memories of the past month still haunted him, this was not one of them.
This…this was something else.
God…what the…?
~~~~~~~~~~
Opening his eyes, Daniel looked to his friends who had gathered beside him. He learned how to walk on stars with these people and in them, found a family he didn’t even realize just how badly he needed.
“Yeah.” he whispered, looking back out into the still dripping night. “I’m alright.”
He had finally found something else that made him soar.
I’m home.
Daniel didn’t know what the future would bring, but right now he didn’t care. So maybe they wouldn’t get their ‘happily ever after.’ For now, he was happy with just the ‘ever after’ and knowing that when the page was turned to the very last picture, it would be with him…surrounded by his family.
/ “…promise me that you’ll never forget.”/
~~~~~~~~~~
When their friend assured them that he was alright, but then started studying the pavement as if it were a game of chess, Sam gaped, Teal’c raised his eyebrows and Jack looked…well, shaken.
After furrowing her brow at her commanding officer’s reaction, Sam found her voice. “Uh…Daniel? Are you sure you’re…”
Sam was cut off mid sentence, however, when a wave of water slammed into her face. …caused by a puddle-jumping archaeologist.
Systematically Daniel jumped from one to the other, soaking his friends with rain and giggles. Yes, giggles. This along with his sudden lack of…dry, snapped Jack from his disturbing reverie.
“Ah…Daniel?” Jack pulled his sodden clothes from his body, while Sam and Teal’c did the same. “What’s up?” he asked nonchalantly, when his friend finally stopped long enough to see what he did.
“Oooooh…whoops.” Daniel cringed, but only until his grin returned.
“Daniel…” Jack started again. “what are you doing?” he punctuated in his oh so familiar, "Are you crazy, Daniel?" tone. Which got everybody smiling. …including himself. Damned if he didn’t try not to though.
“I’m puddle jumping, Jack.” was his friend’s succinct, if not sarcastic reply before he went back to his task.
Jack looked to his right where he hoped to find sanity. “Carter? Teal’c?”
Sam bit her lip and shrugged, relishing the moment. “He’s puddle jumping, sir.”
Teal’c inclined his head to agree and clasped his hands behind his back, also enjoying the refreshing change in the atmosphere.
Jack just gawked at them. “I know what he’s doing! Why is he doing it?!” he snapped, right as another wave was launched into them.
“Come on, guys!!” The object in question shouted as he made his way, puddle by puddle to their cars.
Sam beamed and gave herself to the moment. “What’s a girl to do?” she shrugged, looking innocently at Jack and taking a leap.
Glaring, Jack wiped off his face and turned to his last hope. “T?”
Teal’c didn’t turn to look at him. Instead he kept his eyes on the bobbing twins. “On Chulak, “puddle jumping” is seen as a way for children to keep their souls young and clean.”
“Yes!” Jack cried, dramatically gesturing his arms out towards the parking lot. “and do you seeeee any children here?!”
Teal’c still didn’t look at him, he merely raised his eyebrows. “I do not, O’Neill. However, sometimes children are not the only ones that feel the need to replenish their souls.” And with that, Teal’c took a large awkward step forward, drenching Jack’s shoes.
For a moment, Jack stared incredulously at the scene before him. A multiple PHD, a brilliant scientist and an ancient alien warrior…puddle jumping.
Huh…
Biting his lip, the United States Air Force Colonel cocked his head to the side and peered down to study the water pooling at his feet. Then lifting his foot, he dipped his toe in the cool liquid causing it to ripple as he asked himself, “What could it hurt?” - -
- - “If you had one fault it was that you wanted to help people so badly. You wanted to help people so much, that it tore you apart when you couldn’t make a difference.” ~Samantha Carter; “Fallen”
DISCLAIMER: All characters and property of Stargate SG-1 belong to MGM/UA, World Gekko Corp. and Double Secret Productions. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. Any other characters, the storyline and the actual story are the property of the author.