Denial: 101 "Silent Lucidity" written by: Dragonfly
The Powers that Be: Tag
Pulling into the drive, Jack’s stomach flip-flopped when he saw that there were no lights on in the house. It was Friday night. Daniel’s car was parked right in front of his and he knew to be expecting Jack.
*Crap*
Unbuckling his seatbelt, Jack turned off the headlights and engine to his rental truck.
*Maybe Daniel forgot to pay his electric bill* he thought hopefully *It wouldn’t be the first time*
However, the worry building in his chest as he made his way up the sidewalk was convincing Jack otherwise. Something was wrong. He could feel it. He would have been notified if Daniel was injured…still it didn’t mean his friend wasn’t hurting for some reason or another.
Reaching the door, he went to knock, but before he could even do so it swung open with a long, eerie creak. Normally Jack would reach for his gun. Tonight, he reached for strength. Because the last time he came upon Daniel’s home in this state, he found his friend standing on the wrong side of a balcony.
He *was* informed that they were exposed to some sort of illness, but he was reassured that Daniel hadn’t contracted it. Still what if they were wrong? Or what if Daniel *was* somehow injured off world and the new doctor hadn’t caught it? His friend had a penchant for hiding things. In fact, out of the entire medical staff on base, *Janet* had been the only one able to tell if Daniel was doing just that.
*Janet…*
Swallowing the ache that still rose in his chest after losing such a good friend, Jack stepped inside the moonlit house.
“Daniel?” he called cautiously…hopefully.
A breeze brushed against him, begging for attention and Jack turned towards the direction it came.
The sliding glass door was open.
Rubbing a shaking hand down his face, he urged his legs forward…but they were slowed by the weight of his fear.
*It’s just a patio out there* he reminded himself over and over. *Just a patio*
Finally stepping back outside, Jack was grateful that it was at least warm out as he called hoarsely into the night. “Daniel?” But he received no reply and was about to go back inside and call for reinforcements when he heard a small, desolate, “Here” whispered from the left of him.
Looking down, Jack’s brief surge of relief plummeted with his heart at the sight of his friend. “Daniel?” he eased softly, kneeling down beside him. Jack didn’t like what he saw. Sitting with his knees pressed to his chest and arms wrapped tightly around them, Daniel stared blankly ahead, merely shaking his head when Jack called his name.
Jack’s brow furrowed with an even deeper concern. “Daniel…are you hurt?” but the general was only granted another minuscule shake of the head. Not enough to convince him.
Eying his friend closely-the moonlight didn’t reveal any blood, but Jack wasn’t taking any chances. “Daniel…I’m going to take a look at you, okay?”
The archaeologist blinked. “I’m not hurt, Jack.” He stated softly, but didn’t resist his former C.O.’s prodding. In fact, Daniel just sat listless as Jack gently pulled his arms away from his knees to get a better look at him.
Jack was relieved to finally hear a whole sentence coming from his friend, but something was still wrong. Daniel wasn’t usually the quiet type…nor was he the submissive type. He looked completely out of it…lost in thought as Jack went about his business-which Jack guessed *that*, in itself, wasn’t completely abnormal after all. Still…
After not finding any blood and *thankfully*, not eliciting any sounds of discomfort or pain from Daniel during his impromptu examination, the general sat down beside his friend and checked one last thing.
Daniel sighed in both frustration and embarrassment as the back of Jack’s hand pressed against his forehead. “I’m not sick.” he simply stated and Jack removed his hand satisfied.
Jack’s worry was starting to make him sound annoyed. “Well, you’re *something* Daniel!” he shouted, instantly regretting that he did so and ducked his head. When he looked back up, his eyes were desperate with concern and when he spoke this time, it was but a whisper. “What happened, Daniel? Tell me what’s *wrong*?” he pleaded. *Damnit, he’d know if he had been there!*
Jack watched as Daniel swallowed hard and began shaking his head as he fought to contain the overwhelming emotions that seemed to be seesawing between anger and hopelessness. “I just don’t…” the archaeologist’s voice caught and he shook his head again before he was overcome with anger and threw an empty pot that was sitting beside him. The moment the ceramic shattered across the patio, Daniel deflated with a sigh and hid his face in his hands.
Surprised by his actions, Jack tried not to show it. “What?” he asked gently.
Sitting back and resting his head against his house, Daniel looked to the moon as if it held the answers he needed. “I’m just not sure…” he paused again, but this time it wasn’t in an attempt to swallow back his anger. This time…this time he was afraid to say it. He was afraid that if he admitted it, he would be condemning them all to the product of his fear. He was afraid that if he admitted that he wasn’t so sure they would be able to beat the Ori after all…that they were just too powerful, that it would come true. And that he wasn’t *scared* like he had told Jack. But that he was actually *terrified*.
“Just…” closing his eyes, Daniel forced the battle within him to simmer down. If he told Jack what he was thinking, Jack wouldn’t let him mull over it any longer, anyway. And if he told Jack how much he wanted…*needed* him out there with him…Daniel would just end up making him feel bad and even *more* helpless than he was sure he already felt.
“Just, sit with me?” he finally breathed, knowing Jack’s company would be able to keep his demons at bay for at least now. Knowing Jack, without question, would be able to see how badly he just needed a friend’s strong and quiet presence.
And Jack didn’t let him down. Eyes narrowing with concern, he still responded immediately. “Sure.” he answered softly, moving to settle down beside him so their shoulders touched.
And so they sat there in silence, watching from afar the worlds above them. One worried over the fate of them all…while one worried over just one. His own…the one sitting beside him.
DISCLAIMER: All characters and property of Stargate SG-1 belong to MGM/UA, World Gekko Corp. and Double Secret Productions. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. Any other characters, the storyline and the actual story are the property of the author.